I am broke. Hiding from the bank, turning the wallet upside and moths fly out, broke. While I find it somewhat frightening, I find myself unable to get too worked up about it. Perhaps it is because I know there is help if I need it, but I believe it is more than that-- some strange awareness that I will be all right regardless.
While I have been unable to purchase books for bookstores to sell and have spent much of my time working at the Dog Daycare and Vet Clinic to try and support myself, my book seems to be holding its own. It is a good feeling. While my sales are not skyrocketing, it appears word is getting around. Without me having to hassle book reviewers and spam the internet, I maintain steady ebook sales and interest from my local community, though sadly I am currently unable to provide for that interest at this time.
I am hoping things will soon turn around. I have in my spare time been painting and drawing animal companions on commission. It takes a while for me to finish a project given my other needs and responsibilities, but it does help. In addition I have been dog sitting. It can be tough with three dogs and a bird to care for (with a wonderful horse companion to care for at the family farm), but I must do what I must to survive.
It is a joy to have another dog around to cuddle and love, but it is not easy walking three. While Faolan and Raven have been taught to walk on their own sides, a third dog in the mix normally results in chaos. Luckily during the week the dog I am sitting gets to enjoy free days at dog daycare to give me a bit of a break. In additions I have a few wonderful friends who help me look after the pack.
A friend and I have given much thought to moving in together and we may take that course. I have wanted a house to call my own for some time now, but have been unable to afford it, especially now, but with our combined incomes we may be able to rent a house together. We both share many interests, especially our love for animals. It will certainly be a zoo, but a happy one. Hopefully we can find a place to call our own. I foresee a series of hilarious photos, videos, and sound files to ensue.
Hopefully when my living arrangements change, in addition to the finishing of my second novel, I will have a more stable financial situation and future. I worry not only for me, but for those I look after. My animal companions are very dear to me and I will always strive for the best for them.
Maybe one day I will have the small farm I dream of. Where I can grow strawberries, tomatoes, and squash, watch birds at the bird feeder, play with the dogs and chickens, and go for hikes and trail rides on a beautiful property. Maybe one day.